Plot summary: A child actress with a rare medical condition that prevents her from ageing begins kidnapping her former co-stars for a twisted reunion.

(Originally published on The Reel World April 10th, 2021)

Notes

Original Air Date: October 1^st, 1994

Directed: Dan Riba (7)

Written: Paul Dini (17)

Animation: Studio Junio (7)

Music: Carl Johnson (6) (supervised by Shirley Walker)

‘Cousin Spunky’ is almost certainly a reference to Cousin Oliver, who many blame for the decline and cancellation of The Brady Bunch. This became a trope in a number of sitcoms, adding a cute child character to try and boost declining ratings.

Furthermore, Cousin Oliver’s actor, Robbie Rist, voices the father in Baby Doll’s sitcom.

Baby-Doll’s heavies are an homage to Gilligan and Skipper from Gilligan’s Island.

Recap

An actor stumbles across a crying little girl after his show and tries to comfort her, but quickly recognises her and seems afraid.

His fears are immediately warranted as he gets knocked out by her accomplices.

Summer Gleeson (remember her?) immediately fills us in on the mysterious child, presenting a ‘where are they now?’ piece on an old sitcom called ‘Love That Baby’, starring Mary Dahl, the kid from the opening. Turns out three of the original cast have been reported missing…

The plot thickens, as we learn from Batman that Dahl suffered from a rare medical condition preventing her from ageing, and that she was 20 at the time of the show, despite looking like a young girl.

The exposition game is interrupted by Harvey Bullock calling in gunfire from the theatre where the final cast member is under police protection. Batman & Robin swoop in to assist Bullock’s men, but the actress is kidnapped regardless.

Batman attempts to pursue, but a small girl runs out in front of the Batmobile and he has to swerve to avoid her. Her ostensible mother collects her, but The Dynamic Duo recognise Dahl’s TV catchphrase. She throws a smoke bomb and escapes.

The kidnapped actress awakens on the set of the old sitcom wearing a larger version of her old costume and is horrified to see Dahl has still not aged a day and means to keep them together forever… or murder them!

Bruce confronts Gleeson about the exposé, and she reveals Dahl quit the sitcom to pursue a serious drama career only to fail miserably, which led her becoming a recluse.

Robin borrows some old ‘Love that Baby’ tapes for research, which Summer attempts to trade for an exclusive interview, but the pair of course vanish into thin air.

Dahl forces her former TV family to act out little birthday scene, going as far as to play a laugh track. She explains how difficult her life was, but now they’re back together, everyone will love her again.

Batman & Robin swap notes about the sitcom, and we learn that they introduced Cousin Spunky, who embarrassed her in a birthday party scene, causing Dahl to quit on the spot.

They correctly posit that Spunky will be Dahl’s next target, with Dick disguising himself as the actor and getting captured on purpose. Batman follows them to the studio and the jig appears to be up…

Unfortunately they didn’t count on Dahl’s badass assistant, Mariam, who kicks both of the Dynamic Duo’s asses. Batman eventually takes her down and chases Dahl, leaving Robin to rescue the hostages.

Dahl Big Wheels her way to a nearby theme park, where she is naturally incredibly difficult to spot. Bruce puzzles the situation out beautifully, standing in plain sight and letting dozens of excited children flock to Batman, with only Dahl staying put. Chef kiss.

Continuing his pursuit through the park, he eventually corners her in a closed funhouse where her small size gives her an enormous advantage in the narrow tunnels.

Stumbling into a hall of mirrors, Dahl is pushed over the edge by the sight of her elongated appearance, making her resemble an adult woman in her own mind. She fires her gun wildly before breaking down in tears and hugging Batman’s leg.

Best Performance

This episode is stuffed with fun voice acting from our principal cast, and the TV family comprised of Jason Marsden, Robbie Rist, Judy Strangis and Alan Young. Heck, Tasia Valenza’s deadpan delivery of the line “it’s a living” after kicking Batman & Robin’s asses is outrageously good.

But Alison LaPlaca’s performance towers over all. It might actually be the finest individual work in the entire series. Leaning so hard into the intentionally grating baby-talk voice is one thing, but she effortlessly delivers it in varying ranges, with Dahl slipping in and out of ‘character’. Heck, when she’s called on to do some Capital ‘A’ Acting, she crushes that too, with the Macbeth clip providing a slightly comical prelude to the devastating closing scene. ‘Heart of Ice’ could not dream to match the tragedy of her remarks about the ‘real’ her, and her fury that Batman couldn’t let her pretend.

Episode Ranking

Boy, oh boy. Girl, oh girl. Season 2 has been pretty kind to us with villain-centric episodes (if you ignore ‘Sideshow’ and ‘The Terrible Trio’). I won’t go quite as far as to call this the best one, but it’s right up there.

Paul Dini deftly weaves a tale that makes it past censors while still being equal parts heartbreaking and sinister. The cast of a cancelled TV show getting kidnapped and forced to participate in a reunion at gunpoint is something that any live action crime procedural would gladly take a stab at, but animation allows for an ostensible child to be the puppet master. It also allows for a funhouse mirror to make her look like a completely different adult woman, which again wouldn’t be possible with real actors. Bravo.

The action scenes are surprisingly good as well, with Robin barely escaping death via last-second somersault, Mariam’s shocking badassery, and the clever little theme park chase scene. Many Batman episodes conclude in such a venue – heck, even Mask of the Phantasm did it – but this one gives ‘Robin’s Reckoning’ a run for its money for the best one. Mr. Dini, take a bow.

[2024 Edit: Slightly too high. A few little elements could have done with some tightening up, but it does have everything needed to contend for the Top 10]

1. The Laughing Fish
2. Mask of the Phantasm
3. Almost Got ‘im
4. Heart of Ice
5. Harlequinade
6. The Trial
7. Shadow of the Bat Part I
8. I Am the Night
9. Robin’s Reckoning Part I
10. Baby-Doll (NEW ENTRY)
11. The Man Who Killed Batman
12. Perchance to Dream
13. Two-Face Part I
14. Bane
15. A Bullet For Bullock
16. Joker’s Favor
17. Read My Lips
18. Feat of Clay Part II
19. Catwalk
20. The Demon’s Quest Part II
21. Harley and Ivy
22. Robin’s Reckoning Part II
23. House & Garden
24. Beware the Gray Ghost
25. Mad as a Hatter
26. Heart of Steel Part II
27. Appointment In Crime Alley
28. Two-Face Part II
29. Pretty Poison
30. Shadow of the Bat Part II
31. Feat of Clay Part I
32. His Silicon Soul
33. Off Balance
34. Vendetta
35. Birds of a Feather
36. Heart of Steel Part I
37. On Leather Wings
38. See No Evil
39. The Clock King
40. It’s Never Too Late
41. Joker’s Wild
42. Eternal Youth
43. The Cape and Cowl Conspiracy
44. The Cat and the Claw Part I
45. Zatanna
46. Day of the Samurai
47. Avatar
48. The Demon’s Quest Part I
49. The Mechanic
50. The Strange Secret of Bruce Wayne
51. Terror in the Sky
52. P.O.V.
53. Christmas with the Joker
54. Fear of Victory
55. Be a Clown
56. The Worry Men
57. What is Reality?
58. Fire From Olympus
59. Night of the Ninja
60. Mudslide
61. The Cat and the Claw Part II
62. Nothing to Fear
63. Prophecy of Doom
64. Tyger, Tyger
65. Blind as a Bat
66. If You’re So Smart, Why Aren’t You Rich?
67. Dreams In Darkness
68. The Last Laugh
69. Cat Scratch Fever
70. Moon of the Wolf
71. Paging the Crime Doctor
72. Time Out of Joint
73. Sideshow
74. The Under-Dwellers
75. The Forgotten
76. The Terrible Trio
77. I’ve Got Batman in My Basement

Rogues Roundup

Baby-Doll (Alison LaPlaca) (first appearance)

Much like The Ventriloquist, this is just a flawless elevator pitch for a character that doesn’t need much to work. The notion of a tiny child actually being a thirty-something-year-old criminal with multiple henchmen is great in itself, but the way they utilise that concept is sublime.

Honestly, just put on the final 60 seconds of this episode and try to change my mind that this is a top ten BTAS villain. If you need further convincing, consider her badass bodyguard, Mariam, who is being combined with her.

[2024 Edit: Okay, I do stand by this but think she’s literally one spot too high as Bane had more going on. I thiiiink he slides further up later, but if not, I’ll swap them.]

1. The Joker
2. Poison Ivy
3. Harley Quinn
4. Mr. Freeze
5. Two-Face
6. The Ventriloquist
7. Catwoman
8. The Phantasm
9. Baby-Doll (NEW ENTRY)
10. Bane
11. Mad Hatter
12. Penguin
13. HARDAC (and Randa Duane)
14. Clayface
15. Ra’s al Ghul
16. The Riddler
17. Lloyd Ventrix
18. Killer Croc
19. Count Vertigo
20. Clock King
21. Rupert Thorne
22. Nivens
23. Josiah Wormwood
24. Scarecrow
25. Roland Daggett (and Germs & Bell!)
26. Talia al Ghul
27. Sid the Squid
28. Thoth Khepera
29. Maxie Zeus
30. Jimmy ‘Jazzman’ Peake
31. Tony Zucco
32. Man-Bat
33. Hugo Strange
34. Red Claw
35. Arnold Stromwell
36. Mad Bomber
37. Tygrus
38. Rhino, Mugsy and Ratso
39. Kyodai Ken
40. Gil Mason
41. Nostromos (and Lucas!)
42. Cameron Kaiser
43. Dr. Dorian (and Garth)
44. Mad Dog
45. Ubu
46. Professor Milo
47. Romulus
48. Sewer King
49. Boss Biggis
50. Montague Kane
51. The Terrible Trio